I Built a Mail Server From Scratch and Spent Most of My Time on Four DNS Records
Getting a mail server to send email is easy. You provision a box, run an installer, point an MX record at it, send a test, and something arrives somewhere. That part took an afternoon.
Getting a mail server that Gmail will put in someone's inbox is a completely different job, and it is mostly not about the mail server. It is about convincing a stranger's spam filter that you are not a spammer, using DNS records you have to get exactly right and a signature that has to be applied at exactly the right point in the pipeline.
This is the whole build, in the order I would do it again. Every domain below is example.com, because the real one belongs to a client.
Why self-host at all, and when not to
Be honest about this before you start.
Hosted email exists and is good. Google Workspace and Microsoft 365...
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